The taboo romantasy avoids, and why I didn’t.

Where Are the Sexual Assault Survivors in Romantasy?

Apr 18, 2025

*This post discusses sexual trauma, not in graphic detail, but please take care of your well-being before reading.

Let’s set the record straight: I don’t want to read scenes where characters are sexually assaulted. The Highlander scarred me for life. I also don’t want to read sexual assault (SA) as part of the romance. I get that some readers are into that, and that’s perfectly fine. it’s just not what I want to read or write.

The worst, though, is when SA happens on the page and the story excuses it. I once read a bestselling vampire series where the FMC is raped by one of the MMCs—and she explain that he “couldn’t help himself.” In the next book, she calls him the most trustworthy man she knows. WTF?

So no, I’m not asking for on-page depictions of rape.
What I do want is to see protagonists who grapple with their trauma. And one of the most common, and most silenced, traumas people carry is SA.

If this spoke to you, please share. It might be exactly what someone else needs to hear.

😶 The Silence Around SA in Fantasy

I understand the appeal of escapism. There’s a reason I named my blog Romantic Escapes. But while all romance offers a form of escape, other subgenres aren’t afraid to confront this topic. One example is The Deal by Elle Kennedy, a TikTok bestseller. It’s a contemporary romance featuring a protagonist who is a rape survivor. The romance centers on her journey toward healthy, satisfying intimacy. It’s a wildly successful book. That alone proves romance readers aren’t avoiding this topic. Far from it. There are many more examples of romances that tackle this.

Why is sexual trauma taboo in romantasy but not in other romance genres?

It’s worth nothing that traditional and indie publishing are very different in the freedom they allow when exploring topics that might be viewed as uncommercial. That’s one reason I chose to self-publish.

Romantasy has exploded in popularity over the past two decades, blending epic fantasy with central love stories. These stories subject their heroines to brutal conditions: slavery, torture, captivity and war. But almost uniformly avoid addressing SA, especially when it comes to the FMC.

And I get it. War and slavery, while very real in parts of the world, are not part of the lived experience for most romantasy authors, or their readers. So when Sarah J. Maas writes about a hero enslaved in the salt mines, it still feels like escapism. Why? Because her readers don’t live in fear of being enslaved. But they do live in fear of being SA.
Even in YA books like The Hunger Games or An Ember in the Ashes, where characters suffer horrific violence, SA is carefully sidestepped.

🧠 The Psychology of Survivor Guilt

Some survivors manage to rebuild their lives. Others don’t.

When we erase these stories entirely, we deny readers a space to process their trauma, and the emotions that come with it, like self-blame.

We often blame ourselves for what happened in the first place[1]: “If I’d worn something else.” “If I hadn’t gone there.” “If I hadn’t drunk so much…”
Or my personal best: "If I hadn’t been late for school, there would’ve been more people on the street, and he wouldn’t have jumped me'.

Survivors often freeze. They don’t fight back. It’s an evolutionary survival mechanism[2], and yet they blame themselves for it.

And to make things even more complicated, most sexual assaults aren’t committed by strangers. They’re committed by people we know[3]. That adds more layers to the trauma, and makes it even harder to process.

To this day, there are experiences of SA I’ve never shared out loud. Some because I didn’t want my family to be hurt by the truth about the people they loved and trusted. Some because it's still too humiliating to retell. And yeah, I know how that sounds—that I still choose silence in some places. But that’s the thing—it’s my choice whether to speak up or not. And having a choice is power.

Literature, especially literature written by women for women, should help us process these experiences.

And here’s another truth: People who’ve been SA can still have healthy, meaningful, intimate relationships. That, too, should be shown in books. It should be empowering and give hope to survivors.

While not every woman has experienced rape, most have experienced some form of SA[4]. That means nearly every woman reading romantasy has likely lived through some SA.

Romantasy often tackles trauma—racism, oppression, war—but it rarely, if ever, shows heroines surviving this kind of trauma.

Why? Maybe it’s the genre’s commitment to creating powerful, inspiring FMCs. Maybe if you’re the realm’s best assassin, you’re too “strong” to ever lose your autonomy in that way.

In romantasy, heroines can be beaten, enslaved, emotionally tortured, but sexual violence is conspicuously absent. For example:

In Sarah J. Maas’s Throne of Glass and A Court of Thorns and Roses, the heroines face imprisonment, slavery, brutal torture, and life-threatening trials. Yet none are ever sexually assaulted.
In Fourth Wing by Rebecca Yarros, set in a brutal war college where death is everywhere, sexual assault is intentionally excluded.
In From Blood and Ash by Jennifer L. Armentrout, the heroine, Poppy, is subjected to captivity and endless violence. There are hints of predatory behavior from villains, but any serious threat is quickly cut off, either by a protective male character or by Poppy herself.

In ACOTAR, Rhysand is the only SA survivor, yet his trauma is never named as SA trauma. In fact, instead of being considered a survivor, Maas portrays him as someone who chose to whore himself. And the fact that the only character explicitly sexually violated is male is not a coincidence either.

Romantasy lets a heroine survive hell, just not the hell too many readers know firsthand.

✍️ I Wrote a Romantasy with a SA Survivor

I chose to write a romantasy novel with a FMC who has survived sexual assault. There are no graphic scenes. Like most romantasy authors, I believe this genre should be a safe space. But safety doesn’t mean silence. It should also be a space where survivors are seen. There is life after SA, and readers deserve to see that.

One of my early readers told me the inclusion of SA in my romantasy was a turnoff for her. That’s okay. It’s a dark romantasy. It portrays a violent, brutal world in which, among other war crimes, SA is weaponized as part of warfare.

But like Margaret Atwood said about The Handmaid’s Tale, I also didn’t make anything up. Everything I wrote happens somewhere in the world as you read these words.

But it’s still romantasy which means there’s also a promise to an HEA. My FMC gets to process her SA trauma. My MMC gets to process his trauma. They save the world together and they are forever in love.

What do you think? should romantasy make more space for survivors’ stories?
Have you read any books that handle this well? I’d love to hear from you.

S.H. Schreiber - Romantic Escapes

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